How do you say "goodbye" to someone that has already gone away?
This is the first thing that popped into my head today when I heard the terrible news.
She had been battling Cancer for nearly a decade. Pushing back the deadly disease with life. She had friends that cherished her, family that relished her and children that revered her. She was beautiful on the outside and soft and kind on the inside. She was strong and smart and all kinds of funny. She was never afraid to mix it up. At least this is what I remember about her.
I haven't seen her in years. Both of us busy with family and business. The usual shit. But every once in awhile there would be an email offering a kind word about my family being beautiful or that my blog made her laugh. That always made me smile.
I don't think we, as human beings, realize how much we contribute to each others lives. The little thoughts and prayers we send out into the universe, the fleeting glances, the smiles, the Facebook "likes". They all mean something.
We often don't notice the significance of a hug or a phone call when it happens but every little thing, good and bad, sticks to our DNA like Velcro darts flung across the room.
All of these things, these tiny little offerings of unnoticeable generosity, sit on us like dust sits on a forgotten bookshelf.
I sent her an email the other day. I only wanted her to know that she was being thought of. It sounds weird to say that to someone but it really is one of the most honest truths that can be communicated to another human being.
"I'm thinking of you."
You are a part of me. You are a part of every single person that had the pleasure of meeting you. You are in our DNA. The thoughts and memories of you can't be stopped.
How do you say "goodbye" to someone that is already gone?
You remember them.
And smile at the person next to you on the train or the bus or at the supermarket or wherever you are. A person's legacy can simply be the smile they gave to you, passed on to another.
You are already missed friend... Even in God's arms you are still here with all of us.