Friday, March 19, 2010

Do They Eat Chili In Chile?

Fact: I Love My Kids.

Fact: I don't know what the fuck they are talking about.

In the car on the way to school...

7 Year Old - It's so sunny out. Why do I have to wear my jacket?

Out-Numbered - Because I said so.

7 Year Old - That's not a real reason.

Out-Numbered - To me it is.

7 Year Old - Seriously Dad. Why do I have to wear my jacket?

3 Year Old - Yeah. Seriously.

Out-Numbered - You. Zip it.

3 Year Old - Sorry.

Out-Numbered - You have to wear your jackets because it's chilly out today.

7 Year Old - Did you know they had an earthquake in Chile?

Out-Numbered - What?

7 Year Old - They had an earthquake in Chile.

Out-Numbered - What does that have to do with your jacket?

7 Year Old - Do they eat Chili in Chile?

Out-Numbered - What are you talking about?

7 Year Old - Chile is too spicy for me.

3 Year Old - I don't like spicy.

Out-Numbered - What are you guys talking about?

3 Year Old - Daddy?

Out-Numbered - Yes.

3 Year Old - What are you drinking?

Out-Numbered - An energy drink.

3 Year Old - What's it called?

Out-Numbered - It's called Monster.

3 Year Old - Is it a good Monster or a bad Monster?

7 Year Old - It's not that kind of monster.

Out-Numbered - It's just a silly name, baby.

3 Year Old - But is it a good monster?

7 Year Old - She's an idiot.

Out-Numbered - Stop that. She's not an idiot.

3 Year Old - I'm not an idiot.

7 Year Old - Yes you are.

Out-Numbered - ENOUGH! It's not a monster, baby. It's just a drink.

3 Year Old - But what if it's a bad monster?


Out-Numbered - I SAID ENOUGH!

3 Year Old - What would you do if it's a bad monster?

Out-Numbered - I would beat it up.

7 Year Old - Dad, you said it's not a real monster.

Out-Numbered - It's not. I'm just saying it hypothetically.

7 Year Old - What's hypothetically?

Out-Numbered - Google it.

7 Year Old - Dad.

3 Year Old - What's Google?

Out-Numbered - Let's listen to music...